Over at The Liminal World there is a quick post about MySpace and how they might be to blame for the issues at hand. If you haven’t kept up with things, recently MySpace has been in the news for being a hot-spot for child predators. The site is being used by pedophiles to prey on children and try to meet with them, gain access to photos, and other unlawful things.
As I understand it, MySpace originally was used primarily by the amateur music industry. A musician or band would set up a profile. The radio DJ’s would keep a watch on the sites (internet station managers/DJ’s would join up as well, like my brother did) and from what one DJ told me, this continues to be a priceless tool for keeping an eye on new releases, concert/live show dates, and band activities.
I don’t feel that just because MySpace has had these issues that the owners are to blame. I also don’t feel that it’s right to bastardize such a good concept…but that’s what has happened. MySpace has turned into a haven for dating profiles, school profiles, and the ever popular blog site. Not only is it being used for musicians but now someone joins up and with the ease of the site, builds a basic profile, finds sometimes random ‘friends’, and the goal becomes a popularity contest.
I don’t feel MySpace is used in this way everywhere. My brother runs his radio station and uses this strictly for the reasons I mentioned above. I know a few that joined just to keep in touch with school friends they had lost contact information for. I responded to Greg’s post from his site just below and I think it outlines most of what I feel about MySpace and his write-up. (BTW, I love his thoughts–they are always compelling and make me want to give my opinion!)
My response:
MySpace is only ONE example. This SAME issue came up with AOL when it was a huge chat location. It’s ridiculous to put any blame on the creators.
MySpace was originally created and used by the amateur music industry. My brother, with his radio station, says the site is a priceless tool for new release notices and keeping up with the bands he plays.
When others picked up on the site and began to spread it out as a ‘meat market/dating site’ that’s when this problem arose.
How can the owners sit and say “well, you are just here for the dating, you don’t like music” and just delete accounts on opinion?
I think just because humanity is the way it is and people were drawn to the ease of the site (no html needed!) and that it links up (for musicians to connect, originally) quickly…it just created a huge, random social place.
That is like saying a club owner who has patrons that come in could refuse a guy based on his looks–thinking he might be there to rape a woman. Unless there’s proof he’s a pedophile or proof that the guy walking in IS a criminal…they would let him in.
Too many lawsuits these days based on fantasy.
I agree–we’ve GOT to keep an eye on what our children do. I have a 14 year old on the internet but I keep a close watch on his activities there and I stay involved in the sites he’s bookmarking, visiting, and joining. (incidentally, he’s not on MySpace by choice, he is using another less popular one b’c all his friends are on it from school…and yes, I know his username/information and can access his account if needed)
So, what is your take on the MySpace issues that are being pushed and highlighted by the media? Do you feel that your children should always have a safe haven on the Internet or do you feel that you should make sure and keep a watch on their activities?
I’ve got three kids. I keep an eye on them. Especially the 12 yr old. She’s really smart, BUT the pervs out there are smarter. We are going to hook up our Mac Mini upstairs and let her use that for communicating with friends etc… I trust my daughter, just not the pervs!!
I’m glad to see parents are taking action against online predators. However, a lot of people are taking aim towards MySpace and tyring to pin the blame on them. The answer to this is simple. If you don’t want your kids on MySpace, use software to block it. If you don’t want your kids using an instant messenger program, then have the ports that they use blocked. I don’t want my kids having free reign over any instant messaging program or the internet, that’s why I took action and made sure they can only access what they need to. It’s not expensive to do and doesn’t require much computer knowledge to do.
My 2 cents. I’ll shut up now. Have a nice weekend everyone.
SJ
I recently went to a school and covered these topic to the elementry students. Most of them have not been taught internet safty so that is what I spent a lot of time on. The internet can be a dangerous tool if children are not taught basic safty tips. It is not myspace’s responsibilty to regulate what people are doing but the parents of these children.
The problem with the internet is just that its the internet. There are more and more ways of communicating with people then ever. MySpace just happens to be one of them. I myself have a myspace profile. NOOO Im not a stalker or anything of the sort. The orgional consept of the site is great and I have found more friends on there than I could of ever done searching google. Yes these people I know but lost contact with. The creaters of myspace cant be responsible for what people are doing on the site. If some 40 year old wants to message a 12 year old then it will happen whether on myspace,ipals,or tagworld.
If I remember correctly there was a episode of WifeSwap that involved MySpace and a 12 y/o girl that had “sexy” pics up and the replacement mother didnt appove of it and made the correct changes. The parents of this child had no clue what she was doing on the internet the whole time. So Point being is you have to watch your children and restrict what they can and cannot do on the computer.
Ok my rambling is done… soo long too… lol but thats my .02
I think it’s every parent’s responsibility to not only monitor their child’s internet activity, but also to teach their children safe internet habits. Part of the problem comes in when the child is more computer-savvy than the parent. I’m lucky in that it’s the opposite with me and my son.
I have a 12 year old son and a 15 year old brother. My brother spends a lot of time on My Space and convinced my son to join up (even though he’s too young). They both told me, though, and I made sure that I was on both of their friend lists. This means that I can kind of “check up” on both of them from time to time. My son told me recently that he’s not interested in it and has abandoned his account. The reality is that he’s too young, but I’m glad he came to it on his own rather than me turning it into forbidden fruit.
I know a girl, a friend of my brother’s. She’s 14 years old with a screenname of (altered, this is not her actual screen name) “bangin’ bunny”. Her profile lists her as 14 years old and is covered in Playboy bunny logos. Her hottie photos and sexy talk are just a couple of things that are going to get her in trouble. But it’s not going to be My Space that does it, she’s the same way IRL and it all comes back to a lack of parental involvement.
My Space has always been a social networking site, just like Friendster and Multiply and all the other ones. My Space *Music* was created later for the music industry to use. It’s the same as any chatroom or personals site and it’s not a flaw of the concept, but a lack of involvement or awareness that causes things to get as out of control as they do.
It’s up to individuals to be smart about services that are available, but I think that in this day and age, Americans are being taught to shift the blame to anyone else, preferably those with money (aka those they can sue…)
Cat, I agree with you. If it wasn’t Myspace, it would be something else. Anywhere that kids can congregate, online or offline, could result in predators. It’s up to the parents to educate their children, and in my opinion, it’s partially their fault if anything happens.
I agree with you 100% Cat. MySpace is not the enemy, it’s just the tool. A hammer can be a very useful tool, but it can also be a deadly weapon. That doesn’t mean that we should ban hammers, we should just take care to watch who is using them and how. MySpace is exactly the same way. There is no such thing as a truly “safe” place for kids online, and parents that believe there is need to get a cold hard reality check before something terrible happens.
My step daughters aren’t allowed on the internet at all unless I am sitting right next to them, and even then it’s strictly for school research. I know that they are not responsible enough for it. If and when they are allowed to access the internet freely, we will have a net nanny that blocks sites and logs EVERYTHING. ALL usernames and passwords will be readily available to me, and if I find out that they are lying about anything, the computer is gone.
I reccomend that everyone with a child or teen online check out http://www.perverted-justice.com It’s very disturbing, and very hard to read, but the only defense we have against pedophiles is knowledge.
Parents just need to take a more pro-active approach to parenting and get involved in what they do. That doesn’t mean they have to watch like a hawk but they should know where they are going and have good communication. I wish parents would stop blaming everyone else.
Hey! You stole my battle!
MySpace is not responsible for people abusing its site.
It’s funny you have the post up now and we’re in a battle – ’cause my post is about parents taking the time and effort to be responsible for their kids – and that’s what should be done with MySpace.
My son has a MySpace and I have no problem with it. But yeah, I visit once and while and read it and see what’s going on. If Mr. Pedophile was leaving comments or whatever, I’d realize it.
You might find this link interesting. http://www.mycrimespace.com/
I believe stupidity is to blame. If you post your personal information online, wether it’s Myspace or on another website, you’re going to have problems sooner or later. I think parents need to teach their kids that they shouldn’t give out personal information online. It’s no different then if someone approached them in the mall for their home address. Would you give that information to a stranger in a store? Of course not, so why post it online for MILLIONS to see?
It’s great to see so many of your commenters showing common sense about the whole Myspace issue. Yeah, MySpace is a place that can potentially be used in the manner that’s currently causing such a fuss, but so is any large chatroom or networking site that allows underage kids access. I actually think that – given there is a problem – MySpace could be doing more than they are to ensure the safety of minors. In the end, the larger problem is that too many parents are still not as aware as they should be about the darker side of internet communication, and even though I don’t believe witch-hunting sites like MySpace is the answer, it has at least done a lot to get the issue out in the open.
I didn’t know that myspace started out as a tool for the radio/music industry..so I learned something new today.
As far as what I’ve seen of it lately I can’t believe any adult would want a myspace account now. Pretty juvenile place to me.
And it is ridiculous to blame any internet venue for problems. Parents need to monitor their kids internet activities and if they can’t …block access to sites they don’t approve of.
it’s myspace … it’s the music … it’s the movies … it’s the videos … it’s the videogames … it’s role-playing games (paper or video or card) … it’s the ouija board.
funny how it’s always something else and never the parents’ fault for not paying attention to their kids.
look, i’m actually not saying that all of the above should be freely available to all children. it’s just i don’t get why there’s always some scapegoat we try to pin things on instead of paying attention to our kids.
if you’re involved and your kids trust you, everyone will most likely get through things just fine. if you get to a point where your kids don’t trust you, you have to actively earn that trust back. you have to set boundaries and live with them … but you also have to know when a “zero tolerance” policy is ridiculous.
talk to your kids. listen to your kids.
then myspace, etc., won’t be the spastic fad of an issue anymore.
just my 2 cents
Happy Easter Cat! Great topic!
XXOO
JTL
New favorite t-shirt: Your mom is in my top 8.
A lot of parents these days are too busy with work or their internet time or other hobbies to pay much attention to what their kids are doing on the internet. I found out about myspace from my ex-partner’s teenage daughter. I discovered she was pretending to be older than what she was – she was 15 at the time and pretending to be 18. I’m sure that her and her friends have met up with a guy through myspace – when they saw him, he was a lot older than what they thought he was. Teens definitely spend way too much time on the internet – I don’t think myspace is to blame, though. Parents should keep a very close eye on their kids. Besides, they really shouldn’t be hanging out online as much as they do! Unlike us grown ups!
I did deal with this very recently, with my daughter, and her MySpace profile. All of her friends from school have them, so of course she followed suit.
I definitely don’t believe the owners of MySpace are to blame, by a long shot! But the facts are the facts. Where children gather, so will the pedophiles and/or sexual predators.
The whole issue has opened up some great dialogue with my daughter regarding the dangers of the internet, and the amount of personal information put out there. We went over her MySpace profile together. She knows she is not to fill out those 106 question surveys, that basically can give a predator information that would take months for him to discover about his potential victim. She knows she is not to message with ANYONE who she doesn’t know personally from school. Her internet usage is monitored by me, as well as her MySpace on an ongoing basis. She also knows she shows even one sign that I cannot trust her to obey these rules, it will be dismantled. Actually in one sense, I’m also glad this came up with her, we have covered areas previously not covered about internet usage and its pitfalls for young kids. (ie; just because a person is on one of your girlfriend’s list of friends, DOESN’T MEAN THAT PERSON IS SAFE. Some kids have no criteria for who they will add to their friends list. This is how pedophiles network)
In summation, I am grateful to the media for the hype over MySpace, as well as some of the articles going over the risks and some of the undercover work that has been done to catch these predators. It has served to aid me, in making an informed decision about my daughter, and to encourage conversation on all the risks.
As far as MySpace’s origins, (being used by musicians and/or the music industry) I see that point as irelevant. Blogs started out as a tool for journalists, and yet there are well over 33,000,000 of them online now. Regardless of MySpace’s origins, the problems that occur there still exist. And the media has been a wonderful tool in arming parents (with information)against yet another danger for our children.
It is up to parents to arm there kids with the necessary information to protect themselves, and to monitor their use. Keeping kids in the dark, or trying to will only lead to niave kids forging ahead BEHIND their parents’ backs. Possibly leading to trouble and/or tragedy. The internet is full of things not appropriate for kids, and overall you cannot hold the site owners responsible. But the media hype, well that has been a guiding tool for me!
Thanks for letting me share my opinion Cat.
3T
Hey Cat! Hope you had a good Easter! *hugs*
I agree with you Cat, I actually posted about this awhile ago in a message board discussion we were having. The problem isn’t myspace- the problem is stupid kids using the internet irresponsibly. There’s just more underage kids AT Myspace than other places.
What a response! It’s really good to see that many parents and non-parents find the blame to be on parenting. So many times we think, “oh, it’s not MY fault” and try to move the issue to someone else’s responsibility.
I’m thankful that so many that read here are keen on what’s going on and monitor their children. Even if it’s a small percentage–that means there will be responsible children out there somewhere! I thank you all for responding and welcome other responses as well.
I didn’t think I could respond to each and every one of you on this since it’s such a general topic with most agreeing with each other.
Thank you all for commenting and visiting my blog! I really enjoy the interaction.
I agree with how parenting does have a great deal to do with what kind of trouble your kids end up getting in or not getting in. What I do not agree with is the response that myspace is not to blame. They do hold some responsibility (how much in a court of law I do not know).
I have a decent technical background. I have been involved in a few projects where age validation is required to fulfill an order or request. The technologies are there in a few different forms, but they are not effectively being used or at all in myspace’s case.
From what I can see, it may get to the line where myspace will be forced to get involved with how users are interacting on their website or at least do something that will help parents closely monitor their teenage kids. Just my 2 cents.
Myspace does not need 18 and older age verification though. They are not a site that holds to the law due to pornography issues.
Many forums ask if you are over 13–MySpace DOES ask this and has disclaimers just like any forum or program I’ve used (AOL does this as well in many areas of their site, I remember)
If you lie or your child lies…that is in your hands. They can’t prove you lied and they shouldn’t have to adhere to porn site rules since what they offer is not against any age laws.
I know what you mean about age validation but I don’t feel MySpace could possibly set that up and it make sense.
I think Yahoo was the one to get hit first about predators. I set up some parentals on a neighbors pc after cleaning it for an hour from viruses and what not and oddly enough that software blocked all yahoo chat rooms automatically. I don’t think Myspace will be the last one to be under the gun. I’m sure there will be another big site to produce some of the same results as it becomes popular. Parents just need to keep an eye on what their children are gaining access to. Simple as that.
What I hate about the whole Myspace thing is that parents react to the news without really learning what Mysapce is.
News: “Oh evil things are happening on myspace”
Parents: “Oh no! Burn down myspace”
Well that’s really stupid. Bad things happen at amusement parks.. no one is saying shut them down….
I agree with you we really can not blame “my space” as a whole,not lot ago about a month someone on digg published an actual link to a pediphile on Journal,anyway they finally made him take it down and when I did click the link(from the digg story)I could not believe it,anyway Journal finally made him take it down,but he had quite a few comments from others who had found his site. It is bad out there but all you can do is try and know what your teenager is into,good post.